Listed below are 5 steps to keeping your marriage feeling new.
- Indulge the kid in you: Not only one of the best ways to keep your marriage young (remember that “young” is a relative term), but a great way to keep you young as well. “Indulging the kid in you” can come in many forms, especially when it comes to your marriage. It basically boils down to HAVE FUN. If both of you enjoy ice cream, then use your adulting privileges and go get a tub of ice cream (and two spoons) late one night on a spur of the moment (don’t do this all the time as it can be a very bad habit to develop… and you don’t want to have a snaccident). If both of you enjoy video games, then pick a lazy weekend afternoon and spend it battling each other out on your game of choice. This method can be applied to nearly every activity that we, as adults, have tried to limit in our lives.
- Keep the romance alive: Now, get your head out of the gutter; I’m talking about true ROMANCE. The best way to keep the romance alive is by doing things (big and small) that make your spouse swoon. Romance is what leads to those butterflies coming back into play after life gets a bit routine. The thing is, I can’t tell you what will work best for your spouse. For some, it’s rose petals and candles all over the house after a long week. For others, romance comes in quick surprises like a kiss they weren’t expecting or a surprise date night (pre-planned). Find what makes the love of your life swoon and use it, mix it up, and keep that romance alive.
- Never stop chasing each other: This is one of the most important things that you can do in a marriage. It is so easy to let life and routine get in the way of each other once you are settled. Let me tell you now though, if you start forgetting your husband/wife and putting them to the side, IT WILL CAUSE TROUBLE. I have seen it so many times and every single time, it leads to fighting. So never stop chasing your love. Whistle at them when they enter a room (yes, like a wolf whistle). Tell them how much they mean to you, very often. Plan surprises for them; it doesn’t have to be on a large scale (see “Keep The Romance Alive”). Keep chasing your spouse like you were still dating and you’ll grow closer.
- No secrets: This is THE MOST IMPORTANT thing that you can do in a marriage. DO NOT KEEP SECRETS… I REPEAT, DO NOT KEEP SECRETS. So, I’m sure that by now, some of you are saying “but I think that some secrets are healthy” and no, just no (for the most part). Let me explain. If you are keeping their Christmas present a secret until Christmas, okay. That is perfectly alright and sweet. If you are keeping some aspect of your life secret, not as much. When you get married, you are becoming one flesh. Meaning, you are one person, living as two. The good and bad parts of you and the good and bad parts of them are all together. They are as much a part of you as you are of them and they deserve to know your life just like you deserve to know theirs. Live as one, with no secrets, and you will be inseparable.
- Do Extra: Now, here is a task that most people overlook. Go the extra mile when doing something for your spouse. Keep in mind, this means that you actually have to do something for your husband/wife. If you are going to clean the house and you each have “chores” that you do, go the extra mile and do one of theirs so that they don’t have to. If you are picking something up for lunch from a restaurant you know that they love, grab them something too and either save it for them, or take it to them. If you know that they are sick and they ask you to grab tissues, pick them up their favorite soup, too. Doing extra is just a way of making the person you love’s life a little brighter.
Here you have it, 5 steps to keeping your marriage new. Realize that these steps have to be tailored to your life. That being said, these are wonderful ways to grow closer together and continue feeling the way you did when you were dating.
I really hope that y’all enjoyed this post and if you want to read more on my views of marriage, click here to see my post on The Truth About Marriage. Much love!